I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
