honey bunches of taint.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize