just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize
