I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
