and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
