chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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