Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
