SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
