Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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