Life is so much better after having sex.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
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