I am in a vortex of obligation.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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