i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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