Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
