U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
from now on my penis is your penis
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
