Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
