Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
It's just like the Real World with babies
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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