Those balls look pretty dangerous.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
It's a yes or no question.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."