Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
