i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back everything I said about communal showers
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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