You're my little dorito
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
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Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
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Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
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