I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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