Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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