did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
is wine microwaveable?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
