As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize