You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
