turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
