Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
oh god the rape fog is back!
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
