Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
