Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
