phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
