wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
she pinky promised me she was 18
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
We need to get me chipped asap
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
