If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
i out mim tonsoeep
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