There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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