Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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