Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
