I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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