I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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