is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
