You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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