he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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