brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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