Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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