Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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