I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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