Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
