She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
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one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
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at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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