how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
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We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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