Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
