im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
