Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
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we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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