So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
